#18 Learn The Lesson

This guy is thinking about his lesson

Learn the lesson, then live. When people do let you down or betray your trust, it’s important to forgive them. However, just as importantly, learn the lesson and don’t leave yourself open to being taken advantage of by the same person or circumstances again. If there’s someone in your life who’s repeatedly proven to be untrustworthy or an emotional anchor (enervator), it would naturally behoove you to avoid them as best you can. It’s entirely possible to forgive someone for past transgressions, yet keep them at distance without taxing your emotions to the brink or build a wall around your heart. Many of us have relatives, friends and co-workers, for example, in our lives where it’s not practical to avoid them altogether. You can, when forced to deal with them, simply do so in a strait-forward, almost professional, manner without getting emotionally heated or wrapped up in their drama. Make the conscious choice to not get your emotions involved and the chances of getting hurt and not re-opening old wounds go down considerably. You can live life on your own emotional terms if you are of a mind to.

When you say you forgive someone, it’s best to leave it in the rearview mirror and not bring it up. As the saying goes: forgive, but don’t forget. The reason you don’t forget is if you don’t learn the lesson, history (your own history), is destined to repeat itself. Bringing it up continuously, however, is counterproductive as it continually binds you to the old, upsetting emotions. It’s a fine line, but your own sanity and growth depends on it.